Monday Madness: Falsifying Education On Your Resume

Do you know anyone who falsified their education on their resume? I do. Do you think people who lie on their resume will get caught sooner or later?

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Dealing With Rejection

Rejection sucks. Rejection leaves us wondering what we did wrong, what is wrong with us, and what is wrong with the other person for not thinking we’re as great as we think we are. A technique I like to recommend is defensive pessimism from Julie K. Norem’s book ” The Positive Power of Negative Thinking.”

According to Norem,

Defensive pessimism is a strategy used by anxious people to help them manage their anxiety so they can work productively. Defensive pessimists lower their expectations to help prepare themselves for the worst. Then, they mentally play through all the bad things that might happen. Though it sounds as if it might be depressing, defensive pessimism actually helps anxious people focus away from their emotions so that they can plan and act effectively.

This technique is especially useful for my pessimistic clients who are down and out from rejection and prolonged difficulty either in their career or job search. The typical mantra of these clients is, “I’ve already tried that and it didn’t work out.” or “I keep getting the same answers from people with no results.” This type of thinking usually gets these types of clients depressed, causing them to lose out on the time they could have spent planning a new strategy or building on their experience.

When I coach job seeking clients, I always remind them of the inevitable rejection they will face in their search. There will always be people who will avoid helping you out, people who pretend to care but really down, and those who fall through with their assistance. Accepting that failure and rejection are a natural part of the process reduces shock and speeds up the process towards the next step.

Do you have a way of dealing with rejection? How do you cope? Can you recommend your techniques?

To read more on Defensive Pessimism, check out Norem’s site here.

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How Your Spouse Is Essential To Your Career: Keep Grounded In Your Values

You and your spouse most likely have a joint belief system or share similar life values. Do you know what they are and do they take a significant role in your life? Do you help your spouse stay grounded in his/her beliefs and maintain integrity throughout his/her career – not just during difficult times?

Neglecting our core values becomes easy when work gets overwhelming. Family, relationships, ethics are just some of the things that put to the side. Children or pets are neglected. Health deteriorates. Your relationship suffers as a result.

Whatever you believe in, make sure you confirm your beliefs and keep yourself and your spouse committed to your values. Perhaps your values might need a second look if they are no longer worth believing in. However, values must take part of the daily dialogue when confronted with day to day work issues and difficult career choices.

There are some people who neglect their ethics when it comes time for a promotion. Perhaps they lie on their resume to get the job. Do you believe in telling the truth and how the truth affects the overall quality of your life? If so, challenge yourself or your spouse to reconsider lying to get ahead.

Values play an immense role in our lives. They dictate our actions, determine the quality of relationships, and affect the outcomes of decisions we make everyday. Keeping yourself and your spouse grounded not only sets firm boundaries and makes knowing what they’ll do next more predictable, but your long term professional reputation will shine as a result.

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How Your Spouse Is Essential To Your Career: Keep Your Spouse Motivated

Go Jags!

You don't have to be a beautiful cheer leader to keep your struggling spouse motivated

Part six of the Partnership Series – keep your spouse motivated on the job front.

If your spouse is unemployed, down and out from a tough rejection, or working on a tough project, you can keep him/her motivated to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Encourage your spouse to take a break from their seemingly endless work. I remember when Franck lost his job in San Diego, he spent hours at the computer neglecting his religious daily surfing. I had to convince him to get up and take pleasure in his life even just for an hour.

Help them break down their goals into manageable objectives. You can act as your spouse’s coach, by just getting them to talk about their goals and objectives. You can even write them down as they talk. When you help your spouse talk about their goals, things become more manageable and realistic to tackle.

Act as a mirror and tell them all of the successful things they’ve done that have led to this point. Above all, keep things into perspective. Remind them that this period shall pass and that they will eventually see the light at the end of the tunnel thanks to all of their hard work and dedication.

Sometimes, all you need to do is just listen. Your spouse might have a lot of things s/he wasn’t able to say at work and wants to get how they really feel about their boss/colleagues/projects off their chest. Perhaps, your spouse doesn’t know how they’re going to find a job and has some worries they’d like to share. Don’t allow yourself to get worked up by their confessions – otherwise, they’ll be scared to share more with you for fear of getting you upset – just remain calm and listen. They’re just words that express how they feel and nothing more and most of the time, that is all they need to move on. This is also a great opportunity to work on your own listening skills.

There will be days when you’re feeling the pinch and become stressed out. This is natural. Take turns listening to each other and continue working on your communication skills. It really does help one’s own morale to focus on helping somebody else work through their problems. You’ll find that you are capable of helping your spouse and yourself move through difficult career phases.

Photo Source: Sports Illustrated Go Jags!

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Mother Of Two Autistic Children: How Moms Add Value To The Workplace

Alisha Enright, her husband, and their two autistic children

I am a young mother to two small boys, four and two, with Autism Spectrum Disorder. The highs and lows make each day a challenge. Having been a stay at home mother for over four years, I have recently began working part time since my boys began attending a special needs school.

Being out of the workforce for a few years makes returning to work a difficult challenge. Employers undoubtedly see the gap in my resume and think, “What could she possibly have to offer over someone else without children?” In fact, plenty.

Employers should be happy to know that having a mom on their team is one of the best decisions they could ever make. After a woman becomes a mother, her life experience and their corresponding skills explodes by 5000%.

Mothers are masters at multi-tasking. We can get you coffee, answer and transfer your calls and take messages without skipping a beat. Oh, and you need those files finished at the end of the day? No sweat. If I can cook dinner, feed the baby, and manage to eat myself, anything else is a cakewalk.

Our time management and organizational skills are our greatest assets. We are creatures of scheduling. Our lives are based upon a schedule with children. So, we’ll make sure you’re in your next meeting on time or that our projects are finished on schedule. We know what it’s like to have someone counting on us.

Need someone who can handle tough clients? Nothing says patience like a mom shopping with a screaming toddler who can manage to get what she came for, pay, and get to the car without crying herself. To the people who stare at mothers with a crying child: everything is under control. You can continue shopping without worrying about my parenting skills. No matter what anybody says, no one has more patience and self-control than a mom. That screaming, unhappy, customer who demands satisfaction is nothing, absolutely nothing compared to a child throwing a tantrum. Easy peasy. We refuse to sweat the small stuff.

How can employers meet us half way? Having an understanding, family-friendly employer makes all the difference. I promise it will make us work harder knowing that we are valued by our employer. Flexibility is key. That is all we need.

Having extra two to three personal days off in addition to sick and vacation time would be fabulous. Let’s face it, kids get sick… a lot. There will be days that I will need to take my child to the doctor. Having a sick child is stressful enough without having to worry about my boss getting bent out of shape because I need to stay home and care for my child. Having the option to work from home on days that I cannot be present in the office is a fantastic solution. If that is not possible, we can work later on other days or come in earlier to make up for lost time.

Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs there is. Being a working mom is certainly no walk in the park. Being a parent in general makes for big challenges and tough decisions. So go ahead and give a mom a chance on your team. If you like all of your work done efficiently, organized, and done with the patience of a saint, you will not be disappointed! Just be willing to wiggle with us as we manage our families.

Editor’s Note: You can find Alisha’s children featured on the cover and inside Florida Crossroads August Issue.

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Monday Madness: Step Brothers Interviews Gone Wrong

Warning: this clip is full of expletives, so don’t watch at work or around children!

Have you ever been in an interview gone wrong? Made a fool of yourself or did the interviewers screw up?

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Job Search Resource: Work In The Arts


Work in the Arts is a job listing resource for creatives and those who would like to work in the arts industry in cities throughout the United States. Don’t just find a job, however, look for opportunities to build your portfolio and your career in general.

At Work in the Arts, we see beyond simply “art jobs” and offer a complete resource for your living, growing career at museums, art galleries, performing arts organizations, advertising agencies, online/web/graphic design shops, freelance assignments, non profits, educational institutions, and multi-disciplinary organizations as well as businesses related to arts.

A portion of any profits from Workinthearts.net goes to Americans For the Arts, a 501c3 Charitable Organization.

Unfortunately, this service is NOT free. It costs roughly 10 bucks a month for a membership that gives you access to all the job listings. Before you subscribe, be sure that your resume is perfect and that your job searching/interviewing skills are solid before investing in this service.

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I QUIT! Memorable Resignations: Steve Slater

Steve Slater could end up in jail for 7 years for his dramatic resignation. Do you think that Slater should be incarcerated for his actions?

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Losing Your Job And Making Lemonade From Lemons: The Lemonade Trailer

An awesome documentary about losing your job and finding yourself. It’s like when Franck lost his job and finally had enough courage (and nothing to lose) to follow his bliss in action sports. It’s like when a former client turned 20 years of salon ownership and styling into directing a beauty college. I could go on and on about the stories of people tuning into their own beat and dancing to it, but instead I ask you to check out this trailer and see how others have continued on.

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Working Mothers Face Steep Employment Challenges

David Leonhardt’s article Labor Market Punishes Working Mothers written for the New York Times explores the disparities in income between working mothers and professional women without children and how they relate to men in the market.

Thanks to feminist movements, legislation has been created to give working men and women equal rights in the workplace.  However, there is little legislation that offers protection to workers with families. Additionally, men still dominate the workplace in executive and middle management, with only 15 Fortune 500 companies with female CEOs and and women still earning an average of 23 percent less than men.

Leonhardt’s article continues to show how working women with children – irregardless of income still struggle with balancing their familial responsibilities with work.

A recent study of business school graduates from the University of Chicago found that in the early years after graduating, men and women had “nearly identical labor incomes and weekly hours worked.” Men and women also paid a similar career price for taking off or working part time. Women, however, were vastly more likely to do so.

As a result, 15 years after graduation, the men were making about 75 percent more than the women. The study — done by Marianne Bertrand, Claudia Goldin and Lawrence Katz — did find one subgroup of women whose careers resembled those of men: women who had no children and never took time off.

On the other end of the spectrum, low-income women generally do not have a choice between career and family. Many are single parents. Their chances of escaping poverty are hurt by the long-term costs of taking time off after childbirth and having little flexibility in their schedules.

A good deal of my clients are women. I have had just one female client with an adult child. All of my other female clients are single with no children at varying levels of promotion; 80 percent have a PhD and are first generation to go to college. When I ask them about their choice to be in their 30s without children and not married, they usually respond with the following question, “What man is going to take care of our children while I work and in what world would I could I earn the same as my male colleagues so I could be the main bread winner?”

Shockingly aware of the facts that stand in their way, this group of professional women choose not to have children to ensure their own financial security. Knowing their personal and professional schedules, these women have little free time to date. Many of these clients balance their personal lives which includes caring for sick parents or helping their younger siblings. The female CEOs and executives I personally know do not have children and made the decision not to have children in order to advance their careers and increase their financial security.

Many of the working women with children I know unfortunately usually do not keep jobs long. They take a lot of time off to care for their children or quit when balancing their children and work becomes too much to handle. Many mothers who stay at home take on many side projects to earn extra money, however most do not become profitable or viable businesses. These women are faced with the decision to choose between their own professional success and their children.

With that said, it is understandable that working mothers do not rise to the top faster and earn higher incomes, because they do not always have 100 percent attention focused solely on their careers. Many working mothers cannot spend long hours at work, go on business trips, nor can they sacrifice their children for a work project. Working mothers, in many cases, cannot offer the type of consistency and long term dedication that men can provide to their work especially in the ways that men owned and operated companies demand.

If you are a woman reading this, don’t let that discourage you. Women are opening more businesses and earning more money than ever before. One of my former bosses owns a successful real estate firm and has three children and was for a period of time divorced. Here in France, women can take 1 year paid maternity leave without fear of losing their jobs when they return.

It’s important to stress that today’s woman must consider career planning to be as equally important to family planning.

Read the rest of Leonhardt’s article here to see how current legislation and employment trends affect working mothers.

Are you a working mother? How far have you advanced in your career? Have you beaten the legal and financial odds stacked against you?

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Posted in Business Culture, Job Market, Salary and Financial Topics | 2 Comments